yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
only if we run a train.
done.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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