ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
