can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
