wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
