operation harelip BJ is a go
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
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