when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize
