i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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