well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I just gargled with NyQuil
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
