I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
organizing the empties. That sober.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
