all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I AM VODKA MAN
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
