rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
