It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Randomize
