I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
