idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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