no, he came in my armpit
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
