Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
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