His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
