Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
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