Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
