So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize