You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
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