So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
