oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
