Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just cut my nipple shaving
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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