i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
high people should be assigned attendants
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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