honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
