with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Is Oprah even human
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
