You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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