Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm getting married
To pizza
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
