I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Can you bring me the toilet please
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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