ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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