Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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