I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
