Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
