You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
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