if only i could text you this smell
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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