I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
