if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
