what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
