They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
