So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
