I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
