Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You can't just leave with hair like that
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
