So drunk its hurt
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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