We won't sleep together?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
