Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize