I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
