Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
