just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
You have to summon your inner elephant
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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