He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
